Ladies : Aiming For a Husband Would Probably Eliminate Your Baby Daddy Problems (Opinion)

Baby daddy problems?

I might rub a few feathers with this post but this needs to be said.

My Facebook feed is pretty interesting. I have people from all walks of life on my list.

There are the ones my age who are getting engaged and married, the entrepreneur promoting their business, the performer trying to sell the dream, and the complainers.

The complainers

I always thought it was interesting that people would divulge their life on social media. I never quite understood the dynamics of people telling their business beyond what others should know. But unfortunately, there are many people who do so.

While this is not a new topic of discussion, lately I’ve been seeing the complainers, particularly women, ranting about their ‘baby daddy’.

I, for one, do not impede on anyone’s business but boy sometimes I would just like to let them have it. After all, they invited me in their business by posting it on social media.

It’s really sad to say but the majority of my generation and the younger of me is backwards. I remember growing up my parents always told me that my brother and I must do better than them.

And that cycle must continue. That my children must do better than myself. And so on.

So while growing up, I always thought three times about the decisions I made and how it would impact my life.

I know the same values and morals were not instilled in everyone. But I cannot help the fact with so much going on in our society, no matter how different each of our lives growing up were, wouldn’t we just want better?

For the cycle of shows like 16 and pregnant to end? Unfortunately as time goes by, the mindset of some of the younger generation is getting worse not better.

Baby Daddy Problems

The thought of this article came when I witnessed two women on my friend’s list go on and on about the father of their children and how they were no good.

Both woman in their 20s like myself. ‘He won’t come see the baby when it’s sick’. ‘He won’t pay child support’. ‘He’s just absolutely no good’

Without judging, I just want to tell these women if you’ve aimed for a husband then you would eliminate your baby daddy problems.

Well maybe I am judging.

I was told not to sell myself short. I always tell my brother if you cannot see her as your wife, then you shouldn’t be having unprotected sex with her to have the risk of having a baby and some unwanted things. I tell my female friends the same thing. If you cannot see him as your husband, then you shouldn’t be having unprotected sex with him to risk having a baby.

I get it. We live in a sexual society, and everyone’s just got to have it. There’s no such thing as keeping your legs closed and making them wait anymore. There’s no such thing as ‘dating” and ‘courting’ anymore. Because you just got to have it. Right? Just because he or she looks good doesn’t mean you need to lay with them! It doesn’t mean you always have to open your legs.

Here’s the thing. I am judging because us ladies cannot simply be that foolish.

When you get into “relationships” with these men, the signs are already there. But yet you divulge into those lustful temptations with them, and now you’re complaining.

If you’ve aimed for a husband you would eliminate your ‘baby daddy’ problems.

What I’m saying is, instead aiming for the thing between his legs, aim for the quality and traits of that man. What is his favorite color? What’s his favorite restaurant? Does he have a middle name? How does he treat his family? How does he treat his mother? What is his personality? Does he seem possessive?

Men, you should be asking the same questions to your woman as well. But this post is about my women right now. I’ll get to you in another one.

And why are you having unprotected sex if the relationship isn’t SERIOUS?

Now you’re mad because the man you laid up with, you knew hardly anything about yet let him hit it raw, is not being the father you want him to be. He is the dirt beneath your shoe. He is completely no good. Now you’re ranting about your ‘baby daddy’ problems. And you want people to feel sorry for you?

Aim higher.

If we simply took time to aim higher for ourselves, a lot of our problems would be eliminated. The same thing applies to my lesbian counterparts. If you aimed for her mind instead of the thing between her legs, then you might find the wife material you so seek.

I’m just saying.

I’m not saying having a husband would eliminate all your problems, but it sure would help having the mindset of aiming for one.

A husband is there for the long haul. A husband wants to be a father. You wouldn’t have to worry about child support with a husband/father, a baby daddy you just might. Do you get my drift?

Ironically as I was writing this article I stumbled upon an article entitled 7 Signs He Won’t Make A Good Husband.

Hmmm …

The problem is most of us are simply too young and naive to even be having children. We become so influenced by society, that we start to believe it’s okay to do what everyone else around us is doing.

Some of these women are not ready emotionally and financially to have a baby, but yet they still engage in activity putting them at risk to have them.

I was in the food store and the cashier that waited on me started talking about babies. She said that she wanted to have one because all her friends were having them. That and she stated she ‘wanted to get it out the way’. I asked her how old she was and she said 19.

Without being too mean or blunt, I simply told her if everyone jumped over the bridge would you do it? She understood, but still really wants to bring a child into this would without any stability?

She’s a part-time cashier, with no advance degree, and still lives at home with her parents. She said she would do everything she could to provide for the baby. Which means what? Stressing yourself to care for a child when you can’t take care of yourself?

Don’t make bringing a child into this world your greatest achievement.

Having a child is a God-given blessing, but be ready to have them with the right man. Simply not because everyone else around you is doing it.

I wanted to say to her why even put yourself through that? There’s so much to live for. Having a baby is a beautiful thing but at 19 you should be thinking about maybe college, traveling, and seeing the world.

What I’m saying is. Ladies, let’s aim higher for ourselves. Let’s make smarter choices for ourselves. Let’s make better decisions. Let’s start thinking.

We deserve it.