#AskRude: I’m in love with her but she keeps running back to him!

Dear Rude,

I’m in love with a young bisexual woman who wants to keep me around yet she doesn’t want to let go of her well know disrespectful boyfriend/newly baby daddy. It makes me sick that she knows he’s a jerk to her & doesn’t know how to treat her nor respect her whenever he is angry with her, yet she still chooses to go back to him.

I just don’t know what to do, every time I try to get away from her we always find a reason to continue talking. It truly bothers me seeing her being disrespected when she deserves better. Even when she states that she knows he’s no good she still runs back & I don’t know if it’s just because he’s a free space to stay, or because she’s really in love, or just her pregnancy hormones. I’m praying that you could give me some insides on this & I know they say lesbians should stay from bisexual women, but you just can’t help who you fall in love with.

Sign,
Love Stuck Sap

Dear Love Stuck Sap,

Honey I’m going to need you to look in your mirror and find your self respect!

I understand love is a big emotion but you don’t allow yourself to disrespected for anyone. Do you not see how wrong this whole situation is?  And it has nothing to do with the fact that she is bisexual. Anyone can do exactly what she is doing.

Never are you suppose to allow yourself to play second to anyone. You are essentially the side chick. To hell with essentially … YOU ARE THE SIDE CHICK! If this person had any love or care for you she would never put you in this situation. And you should love yourself more than this. Once you were aware that she was in a relationship you were suppose to leave her alone. Not stay around hoping that she realizes that he ain’t sh-t!

It seems to me like you justify it all because she is in an abusive relationship but honey that is no where near a good enough excuse. When it is all said and done the person that is going to be hurt is you.

She has a whole life that she is dealing with and you are making it your burden by choice. This is not about her being pregnant. This is about you allowing someone to manipulate your emotions! You’re concerned with her being disrespected yet you are not bothering to see that you are being disrespected. How often do you consider yourself in this situation?

Sweetie walk away form this. It is nothing but drama… Someone else’s drama at that.

I think you should take some time to be alone and learn to love you because anyone who truly loves themselves will not be willing to accept this.

I have been in love before. I was in love with someone amazing… She was the air in my lungs. But despite how amazing she was she cheated on me.She started a whole new relationship behind my back.  She tried to keep me around even though she was in a relationship but I had to love myself enough to walk away. It hurt but I had to love me more than I loved her. At the end of the day she goes back to her new girlfriend. I don’t want sloppy seconds and you shouldn’t either. Furthermore if she can cheat on him with you how are you so certain that she wouldn’t cheat on you with someone else? You ever hear that the way you get them is the way you lose them? Its true honey!

When you die you lay in your grave alone. Put you before any and everyone. You have to stay true to you.

I know this may seem difficult to you but I promise you that when you look back you are going to be totally pissed off with yourself. Don’t allow someone to turn you into damaged goods because they are damaged. You say that she deserves better but are you even seeing that you deserve better?

This is a brutally messy situation my love and I would advise that you walk away from it immediately. It will hurt  but it has to be done. I really do hope you eventually choose yourself.

Madd Love,

Rude