Understanding Adolescent Self-Harm

Adolescent self-harm can be scary for any parent, and it’s important to understand why teens self-harm, what this means, and what parents and loved ones can do to help.

There are different levels of self-harm, with everything from non-suicidal self-injury (NSSI) to suicidal actions.

Let’s look at what you need to know to understand teens who self-harm.

What is Self-Harm?

According to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, self-harm is “the act of deliberately destroying body tissue, at times to change a way of feeling.”

The actions might be different depending on the teen, but the following are common methods of self-harm:

• Scratching or picking at the skin with fingernails, sometimes so much that it bleeds
• Intentionally banging into objects to cause bruises
• Cutting themselves
• Carving words or symbols into the skin
• Burns
• Pulling hair or eyebrows out

Now that we know some of the ways teens might harm themselves, let’s examine some of the reasons why.

Why Adolescents Self-Harm

There are countless reasons why a teen might cause injury or harm to themselves.

To Rebel – One reason why teens might self-harm is to rebel and take risks. If teens are too pressured to be exactly perfect, they may look for ways to escape. This could play out in drug or alcohol abuse, sexual behavior, or self-harm.

Stress – Another major factor when teens self-harm is stress. Overly stressed teens may feel like when they self-harm, they can forget about all the pressures on them and just focus on the pain. This release may be a slippery slope because the more the teen self-harms, the more stressed they will be.

To Be Accepted – Sometimes, teens hurt themselves to fit in with others. They may have found a group of friends that turn to this behavior, so they must hurt themselves to be part of the club. If you think this might be the case with your teen, examine their friend group and make sure you know who they’re hanging out with.

Suicidal Thoughts – This is a very serious reason why teens might self-harm. Suicidal thoughts are different than depression and they can be dangerous. If you think your teen may be thinking about suicide, contact the Suicide Prevention Lifeline as soon as possible.

Depression – Like suicidal thoughts, depression is dangerous and can be a reason why adolescents hurt themselves. Depression is important to understand because we might think that teens are just worn out, tired, or stressed. But depression is actually a mental disorder and a physical reaction in the brain. A teen struggling with depression doesn’t have a choice of whether or not they’re depressed, just like we don’t choose to get the flu or sprain an ankle.

Emotional Tension – Lastly, teens might hurt themselves because they don’t know another way to express their emotions. They might be sad, stressed, or emotionally unstable, but unable to share these feelings. Self-harm is a physical way to express this emotional tension, and may be a call for help. Children who have been abused or faced other traumatic life experiences might be more likely to experience this inability to communicate.

What Parents Can Do

If you think your teen is harming themselves, you should sit down with them and talk about their behavior. This open communication is important and will help you determine the reason why they are self-harming. In addition, parents shouldn’t be judgemental of their teen. Instead of punishing them for hurting themselves, speak to them and consult a professional psychologist if necessary.

Self-harm is scary for any parent, but hopefully here we helped clarified the different types of adolescent self-harm, why teens may turn to self-harm, and what parents can do to help.